NICK'S PICK: 5 Good things about the BATMAN & ROBIN movie

Somewhere out there, a geek has come across the title of this article and has passed out due to Nerd Rage. Hello: My Name is Nick! And allow me to go clarify my statements before someone revokes my Nerd Cred: the 1997 film BATMAN & ROBIN is a terrible, TERRIBLE movie: Clooney was bland as Batman, Bane was turned from an actual threat into a brainless goon, the cinematic style had gone from "gothic" to "campy" to "so flamboyant even the gayest of nerds would commit a hate crime," etc. The fourth movie in the beloved 90's Batman "saga", director Joel "They're called comic books not drama books" Schumacher helped to make BATMAN & ROBIN one of the worst comic movies to ever grace the silver screen. While he may take the brunt of the blame now, let's not leave out the Execs over at WARNER BROTHERS who were more interested in selling toys and Happy Meals than putting together a decent film. That would explain why flavor-of-the-month actress Alicia Silverstone was put into an ill-fitting costume and randomly tossed on screen as BATGIRL. Or why the Terminator himself, Arnold Schwarzenegger, plays a bad-pun spouting, freeze-gun totting, blue-tinted ROBOCOP MR. FREEZE. BATMAN & ROBIN is so bad that George Clooney still apologizes for it! But every cloud has a silver-lining, as the saying goes, so I rewatched the movie and tried to find some things to salvage this mess. Here is what I found...

1. "This is why Superman works alone."
This is early on in the film. After the opening credits and a quick montage of our heroes changing into their Bat gear(Bat Nipples...), we see a quick exchange between the Dynamic Duo about the Bat Mobile:

Robin: I want a car. Chicks dig the car.

Batman: This is why Superman works alone.

This scene surprisingly does quite a bit in such a short time. It establishes character: Robin is light-hearted and a bit more rebellious, Batman is a loner still adjusting to having a sidekick, and the Bat Mobile is made of win! It is funny, with a nudge and a wink to the fans without being cloying to the audience. But best of all, it establishes a greater DC Universe by mentioning another superhero. A decade later, IRON MAN would do something similar by introducing Nick Fury and S.H.I.E.L.D. along with teasers for Captain America and the Avengers.   

This is also the best scene in the movie... Yup. Five minutes in and Batman has blown his Bat-Load.

 2. The Evolution of Robin
As far as character arcs go, Robin is the one that stands out. By the time BATMAN & ROBIN rolls around, Dick Grayson appears to be taking to the superhero gig rather well. He still has a jovial sense of humor but has matured and grown into a hero of his own. Unfortunately, Batman still treats him like a child. The two butt heads until Robin finally leaves to become his own hero.

These events should sound familiar to comic fans as this is similar to how Dick Grayson's Robin became Nightwing. Don't believe me? Compare the Robin costumes from BATMAN FOREVER and BATMAN & ROBIN. Take away the cape(and Bat-Nipples) and you've got Nightwing! Not sure why they didn't commit to Robin's evolution into Nightwing. I'm going to assume they wanted the tone to be happy, so no drama between the Bat and the Bird. Bet they still made Nightwing toys for the movie... money-hungry jerks...

3. A Dying Alfred(?)
I love Alfred Pennyworth. I love him as much as I love Batman. Hell, I might love him more than Batman himself. He is the backbone to the Batman legacy. Bruce's main confidant. And while I like Michael Caine's portrayal in the Nolan trilogy and Efrem Zimbalist, Jr's superb voice work in BATMAN: TAS, Michael Gough will always be my Alfred-Of-Choice. So the concept of his passing was a sound idea. He had been a surrogate father figure to both Bruce Wayne and Dick Grayson. His death would force the two of them to either come together in a time of need or deal with the loss by going their seperate ways... of course he didn't die, now did he? No, Arnold Schwarzenegger was clearly a scientist(No, seriously) who had a cure for Alfred. So the Dynamic Duo stayed together and were joined by Chunky Batgirl who was just...there. But for a moment, Alfred's circumstances looked dire. And in that instance I grieved just a little... Rest in peace, Michael Gough.

4. Hey, Remember Coolio?
Hey, remember Coolio? Yeah, he was a thing during the 90's. Let the records show: "Gangsta's Paradise" was awesome! What does this have to do with BATMAN & ROBIN? A valid question, seeing as how his cameo in the film lasted 2 seconds and he doesn't appear to be on the soundtrack. Hmm... Man, was "Gangsta's Paradise" the shit!

5. It Was a Godawful Film That Killed The Franchise
Sorry, Batman Fanatics, no matter how much "Prep Time" he has, even Batman loses at times.

How is it that BATMAN & ROBIN's failure is a good thing? Good question. For starters, it set the standard of what makes for a bad comic book movie. While not the worst comic book movie ever made(Trust me, I've seen my share), it does everything on such a bad level that it becomes the example we use to critique a franchise. Miscast actors, characters who don't resemble their comic counterparts, plot points that go nowhere, blatant product placement, bad writing, the list goes on. If THE AVENGERS or THE DARK KNIGHT or SUPERMAN sets the standard for quality comic-to-film adaptations, than BATMAN & ROBIN sets the example for those that are scraping the bottom of the barrel.

Second, it ended the Burton/Schumacher film saga before it could get any worse. As the film began getting negative responses, WARNER BROTHERS was already planning another movie. This one would introduce Scarecrow and would also be the return of the Joker!(Apparently somewhere in BATMAN RETURNS there is a newspaper headline that states the Joker has returned. But since nobody noticed it and he was never brought up again, I'm going to assume it was less teaser and more random set design.) But the movie was doomed from the start as it was clearly trying milk the bat for all it's worth(Ewww, bat milking). Before production was even getting started, the execs at WARNER BROTHERS were already pimping out Batman to promote a walk-on movie role contest for OnStar(Seriously? How is the location of the Bat Cave secret if OnStar knows where it is?) They were also looking for the return of Tim "I don't read comics" Burton to direct the franchise. Considering what Burton accomplished when left to his own devices on BATMAN RETURNS(The Penguin is a mutant raised in the sewers? Catwoman has magic 9 lives zombie powers? Rocket-wielding penguins and a Rubber Duckie car?) I'm kind of glad we didn't get to see his interpretation. As much as I liked the first two Burton directed Bat films. I can't imagine Helena Bonham Carter dressed as a creepy mutant crow that causes nightmares.

Lastly, it gave our hero a chance to comeback to life(creatively speaking). I love the Batman films of the 90's, but by the time BATMAN & ROBIN came to be the franchise had run it's course. It was time for a change. And while some of the proposed film prospects were abandoned(An adaptation of THE DARK KNIGHT RETURNS directed by Darren Aronofsky and starring Clint Eastwood as an elderly Batman? Could you imagine that?) we did strike a win with Christopher Nolan(director of MEMENTO, INCEPTION, and everything full of win), who for the first time brought the origin of the Caped Crusader to life on the big screen in BATMAN BEGINS.

"Why do we fall? So we can learn to pick ourselves back up."

That is the mantra of BATMAN BEGINS. And it seems like a fitting one for a movie that followed Schumacher's last Batman flick: after taking a fall in the box office, Batman needed to get back in the fight. And boy did he ever!

Speaking of, the final movie in the Nolan Trilogy, THE DARK KNIGHT RISES, comes out July 20! Can't wait to see how Batman picks himself up after taking the fall for Harvey Dent's death.

NICK'S PICK: THE AMAZING SPIDER-MAN MOVIE REVIEW

Spider-Man 3 came out 5 years ago. And we already have a reboot of the franchise?!? WELCOME TO HOLLYWOOD, FOLKS! MY NAME IS NICK and welcome to my review of THE AMAZING SPIDER-MAN! What's that? Why didn't I do an AVENGERS review? Because, unless you're Amish or are in a coma, you've seen the movie, you know how awesome it is, and the few complaints I have are out-weighed by the truly triumphant moments that will live on in my memory of super heroics! And if you are an Amish or in a coma, how in the world are you reading this right now?

Where was I? Oh yeah: THE AMAZING SPIDER-MAN! So, for those of you who are not familiar with the financial history of MARVEL or the nature of copyright, let me give you the cliff notes: in the early 90's, Marvel went bankrupt. While sorting out their affairs, they began selling off the film rights for their comic properties. Fast forward to today where, despite Marvel being back on their A-Game, the film rights to their properties still belong to the studios who bought them in the 90's so long as they make a film every 10 years. That is why FOX still owns the X-MEN and is working on reboots of the FANTASTIC FOUR and DAREDEVIL. Why THE AVENGERS had stand-in aliens the Chituari rather than the Skrull. And why SONY was in such a rush to get another movie out of one of MARVEL's best characters. Who knew movie execs had stickier fingers than the old Web-Head?(See what I did there?) Yes, 5 years feels a bit too soon to have a Spidey reboot. Particularly for someone like me, a comic geek who fell in love with the art form thanks to Spidey and his spectacular adventures. But let's look at the comic reboot track record: Nolan's BATMAN BEGINS came out 8 years after BATMAN & ROBIN. THE INCREDIBLE HULK came out 5 years after Ang Lee's HULK. Heck, despite some familiar elements(including a Hugh Jackman cameo), X-MEN: FIRST CLASS was basically a reboot done 2 years after the abysmal X-MEN ORIGINS: WOLVERINE. So the possibility of a good reboot was promising... than again the PUNISHER reboot came out 4 years after the 2004 version, so the possibility that this could suck was unavoidable as well. So how does THE AMAZING SPIDER-MAN fair on the reboot scale?

The movie begins similar in the vein of another comic reboot, BATMAN BEGINS. We see a young Peter Parker playing with his father, a scientist who works for Oscorp. Suddenly comes the realization that someone has broken into their homes in search of something. Fearing for their son's safety, Pete's parents drop him off with his Aunt May and Uncle Ben and disapear. Fast forward about 10 years, and a now 17 year old Peter is a top-performing student attending high school and enjoying a daily routine of skate boarding, taking photos for the yearbook, and getting his ass kicked by "Flash" Thompson. While helping his Uncle Ben fix some appliances around the house, Pete comes across a brief case that belonged to his father. Discovering a secret compartment, he finds secret documents linking his father to some gene-splicing experiments at OSCORP along with another scientist by the name of Curt Connors. Sneaking into OSCORP(with a little help from classmate/assistant to Dr. Connors, Gwen Stacy), Peter goes looking for answers... and ends up bitten by a spider!

Yes, this is another origin story.  But rather than driven purely by Uncle Ben and what comes with great power, this movie focuses more on the relationship between Peter and his first true love Gwen Stacy. Which I suppose is one of the reason's SONY brought on (500) DAYS OF SUMMER director Marc Webb(Ha! Spider-Puns!) to bring this film to the screen. As a matter of fact, one of my favorite aspects of this reboot is how well the characterizations are handled. I dug Andrew Garfield as Peter Parker/Spider-Man. When promo images first started coming in, I know fanboys were worried this Garfield would come off more emo than nerdy(particularly after SPIDER-MAN 3). But Garfield is simply playing a different type of nerd. Rather than the classic meek, nose-in-books nerd, he plays it more as the smart guy with this nervous anxiety about him. As Spidey we finally get a wise-cracking, one-liner spewing Web-Head. As Peter, he has a witty charm about him but has trouble fumbling with his words. Especially when trying to talk to Gwen Stacy, played by the always adorable Emma Stone who is the spitting image of John Romita's illustrations. Gwen is a smart girl, quick with the charm as Pete struggles to find his words. Their relationship is very playful and a joy to watch. Of course, their relationship has opposition in the form of Gwen's father, Captain Stacy(played wonderfully by Dennis Leary). He fills a role much like J. Jonah Jameson in the Rami films. As an officer of the law, he views Spidey as a vigilante. He even notices a pattern about Spidey that, even Pete recognizes, makes the web-head seem guilty.

With all this talk of character development, don't think this movie lacks action! It has it in spades! With this movie, rather than rely too heavily on cg, they tried to use stunt work as much as possible. So when you see Spidey swing through the city, Spidey is actually swinging through the city! This lends itself to a number of action scenes that are fun to watch and seem real to the senses. One of my favorite scenes is Pete having a misunderstanding/panic attack on the subway after being bitten by the spider. There's also this great scene where Spidey strings up an actual spider's web in order to feel out the location of his enemy.

This movie does have it's faults. The first being the scientist-turned-villain, Dr. Curt Connors/the Lizard, played by Rhys Ifran. The CGI on the Lizard is... well, it's not that good. Sure, the fight scenes between him and Spidey are awesome to watch but... he just looks off. Part of it is his face I think. His face looks like a Sleestack from Land of the Lost. Or, as a friend pointed out, a Goomba from the Super Mario live-action movie. All I'm saying is, how about we spend a lil money to make the Lizard not look like a carbon copy of the Batman villain Killer Croc? The Lizard's alter ego doesn't fair much better. While Rhys tries to do the best with what he's got, Connors falls flat and has little to do. Which is bizzare since the movie starts out suggesting Connors and Pete's parents might have a deeper influence on the origin of Spider-Man. Yet, 30 minutes in, that story angle gets dropped and basically doesn't get dealt with until the after-credits scene which, once again like Batman Begins, hints at a sequel to this new franchise as well as a possible villain(?).

That is my other beef with the movie. In this expansive movie(a little over 2 hours long!) Webb trys to retell a familiar story in a different way. In doing this, certain aspects that make up the Spidey mythos are either rushed over or left out all together. The Daily Bugle is only seen through news paper headlines, Norman Osborn is mentioned off hand several times in relation to Connors' research, and Pete's childhood friend Harry Osborn is no where to be seen. Perhaps the most offensive of these neglects is the exclusion of Uncle Ben's famous mantra: "With great power comes great responsibility." They have Uncle Ben do everything but say those  6 famous words. After Ben's death, there is a plot device which would have been perfect to have the mantra used, but no such luck. I know that phrase can be over used at times. It's said so much in the first Sam Rami movie you could probably make it a drinking game(If no one has yet, I call dibs on copyright). But to leave out the line entirely is a travesty.

All in all, I dug the movie. Where Rami's Spidey films were influenced by the stories and style of the original 60s-70s comics, Marc Webb brings a modern feel to thestory. The characters were well developed, particularly Peter and Gwen, and the action was intense. Is it better than Sam Rami's films? I think Rami covered the origin better. But I like the Peter/Gwen relationship in this movie better than the Peter/Mary Jane relationship in all 3 Rami films. I can already see people arguing over which movie is better. One thing we can all agree on though: It's better than SPIDER-MAN 3!

NICK'S PICKS: THE TEN BEST CHARACTERS OF THE WALKING DEAD

It's the year 2012: Welcome to the Apocalypse! 

What's that? You didn't know it was the end of the world? Haven't you heard the prophecy?

The Mayans? Nope, not talking about them. I'm talking about that legendary scribe: Robert Kirkman!

All kidding aside, I wanted to take a moment to talk about one of my favorite horror comics that is also one of my favorite television series: THE WALKING DEAD!

 
I love zombies(As a horror device, so keep your dead hands off me)! And comic writer Robert Kirkman(INVINCIBLE, THE ASTOUNDING WOLFMAN, etc.) had the genius idea to write a comic that was basically an ongoing George Romero movie set to paper. Thus was born THE WALKING DEAD, a comic in which we follow a group of survivors, led by Rick Grimes, as they try to find shelter from the hazards of this new world, both dead and undead. The series has gained a definite following. So much so that in 2010, AMC(the network that brought us MAD MEN and BREAKING BAD) began working with Kirkman to bring the comic to life. To everyone's surprise, the television series set during a zombie apocalypse was not only a smash hit but very enthralling television.

With the premier of the second half of season 2 a month away(February 12! Mark you calendars!) I decided to take a look at the constantly alternating cast and do a rundown of my 10 favorite characters from both the comic and television series.(Note to the comic fans: I am a little behind on the comic. So any characters introduced during/after the journey to D.C. will not be on this list. Yes, I am lame. I am also not made of money, thus will catch up on those trades later.)

10. "Bicycle Girl"
When Rick gets out of the hospital, one of the first "Walkers" that he runs into is one which fans have affectionately(?) named "Bicycle Girl." Lying next to a bike, she is missing her bottom torso and clearly has been decaying for quite some time. Craving to bite Rick but lacking the strength to crawl towards him, she is both a terrifying and depressing sight. It's a reminder that, while monsters, these people use to be like us. On his way to Atlanta Rick returns to "Bicycle Girl," apologizing for what happened to her and putting her out of her misery.(There was also a series of webisodes that aired before the premier of Season 2 that explained what happened to "Bicycle Girl." While not too bad, I prefer the anonymity of this particular zombie.)

9. Dale (Comic Version)
It was tough call picking the comic version over the television version. Both interpretation are similar: Dale is the old likable guy in the group with the RV who offers sage advice(even when you don't want it) while wearing his signature hat. What edges the comic version is the purported, er, "relationship" that he has with Andrea and her younger sister, Amy. While it seems unlikely do to their age difference (1) They are initially the only two survivors who slept in Dale's RV, (2) Dale and Andrea DEFINITELY hook up after Amy's death, and (3) it's the FRIGGIN' APOCALYPSE so he is literally one of the last men on Earth. While the comic version of Dale has faced more hardships(including a leg amputation) I'm sure "Shacking up with two hot twenty-something blond sisters in my RV" was definitely on his bucket list!

 
8. Andrea (Comic Version)
While the television version of Andrea has slowly grown on me, I've always had love for the comic version. Sure, she has had moments where she has shut down emotionally(particularly when her sister Amy dies), but with Dale there to comfort her she has risen above the pain and agony and proves that what doesn't kill you can make you stronger. Plus, ever since she was handed the rifle she has become the group's go-to Sniper. Good luck to anyone in her cross hairs.

7. Carl
When a horror genre introduces a kid, it usually takes on an exploration of "Innocence Lost." Enter Carl Grimes, the son of Rick and Lori. Only 7 years old, his father's hat doesn't even fit his head. But now he is forced to grow up in a world where the dead rise. It is quite sad and unsettling watching a child forced  to grow up. Nonetheless, Carl has somehow managed to come out intact(aside from a few bullet holes) and has become a decent shot...

6. Tyreese
When it came to taking out zombies and protecting the group, Tyreese is a fucking tank! An ex NFL star, he and his daughter, Julie, along with her boyfriend Chris join the group of survivors as they leave Atlanta. He and Rick quickly become friends and help lead the other survivors. Despite all the gun training Rick offered him he is a terrible shot. But that doesn't matter much when you're a 6 foot something former pro ball player who carries around a hammer! Zombies never stood a chance! When he was cut from the series(no pun intended) it reminds us readers that the zombies are not the only threat in this new world.

5. Shane (Television Version)
Shane was Rick's best friend and former partner in the police force. Yet he was cut early in the comic and, other than throwing doubt on the father of Lori's baby and forcing Carl to grow up, didn't have much impact on events of the comic. Expanding on Shane is the best thing the TV series could have done. Like the comic, he has been protecting Lori and Carl in Rick's absences and has been guiding a group of survivors. Changes are made however when Rick is reunited with his family. While he still has conflict thanks to his "relations" with Lori, the main conflict comes from the fact that Rick's "return-from-the-dead" signifies the falter in his leadership.(After all, with the sheriff in town who wants to listen to the deputy?) The biggest change however is Shane's will to survive against all odds and what he'll do to keep the group safe. After Carl is injured, Shane and a survivor named Otis go to retrieve an item required for surgery. In one of the best scenes of the series, we witness Shane reliving the ordeal in his head. As he and Otis are surrounded by zombies, he makes a decision in order to make it back with the medical equipment. While you may or may not agree with his decision, you understand why he did it... and that's kind of scary.

 

4. Glenn
If the movie ZOMBIELAND taught me anything it was that the most likely to survive a zombie apocalypse would be the small limber kids who can get out of tight spots and were good at running. Glenn demonstrates this point completely. A former pizza delivery  kid, we first meet Glenn when he rescues Rick from a pack of "Walkers" in zombie-infested Atlanta. Quick on his feet and good with directions and shortcuts thanks to his former job, he is usually appointed the scavenger of the group, grabbing up food and supplies before the "Walkers" even know he was there. Despite basically being the "Zombie-Bait" of the group, he seems to be a rather optimistic individual. With all the loss and hardships he has witnessed he somehow seems to look on the bright side of life. As dark and pessimistic as Kirkman's story gets, I feel we need a character like Glenn around to give us hope.

3. Daryl
Daryl is so far an exclusive character to the TV series, which may be a controversial pick for those comic purist out there(you know who you are). Well I've got news for those people: Superman's weakness to kryptonite wasn't first introduced in the comics but a radio show, Batgirl was first introduced in the 1960's Adam West and Burt Ward BATMAN series, Harley Quinn and Mr. Freeze's origin were introduced by the 90's animated BATMAN series, etc. My point is if it works in another media form, chances are it will make the jump to the comic format. And considering how bad ass Daryl is I have no doubt he'll join Rick and the other survivors in the pages of Kirkman's work. Daryl, a Redneck survivalist, has become the hunter/tracker of the survivor group. A loner thanks to the way he was raised, the group was originally wary of Daryl for fear of setting him off.(Particularly when he found out about the fate of his racist miscreant older brother, Merle.) But after a while he begins to let his guard down. He helps T-Dog survive the "Walkers" on more than one occasion, searches for Carol's missing daughter Sophia on his own, and comforts Carol as his searches turn up empty. Plus, he's makes the crossbow look cool again. When was the last time someone made the crossbow look cool?(If you said "Huntress" you're wrong!)   

2. Rick Grimes

At the beginning of our story, Rick was just a small town sheriff who had never even shot a person on the job. While attempting to apprehend a criminal he is shot and falls into a coma. When he becomes conscious he finds himself seemingly alone in an abandoned hospital filled with dead bodies. Hell of a thing to wake up to a zombie apocalypse. After getting the update on the deal with the "Walkers," Rick makes his way to Atlanta, assuming that his family will be camping there with other survivors. Rick is the "hero" of THE WALKING DEAD. In the beginning of the series, as a former officer of the law, he is trying to distinguish from right and wrong in a world where morality has been thrown out the window. When he finally joins with his family and the other survivors, they look to him as the group leader. And it goes well... for a while. But with death all around, shit goes bad fast. With so much pain and loss on hand(pun intended), Rick begins to lose it. The one thing that keeps him balanced is trying to keep his family safe. That's all that matters to him in the long run. 

So if Rick doesn't grab the top spot, who does?

1. Michonne
The one character from the comic that I am anticipate making the leap to the small screen(Get on that, Kirkman!) is also my number one pick. The mysterious Michonne. How shall I describe the awesome that is Michonne?... I got it! If you threw the character of Elisabeth from THE GIRL WITH THE DRAGON TATTOO into the middle of a zombie apocalypse and give her a katana you would have Michonne. When we first meet her, she is wandering around the country side, carrying in tow her sword and two zombies who are chained together who have had their arms and jaws removed.(For those who haven't read/watched the series and don't understand the genius of this, "Walkers" hunt using all their senses. One of the reasons they don't turn on each other is because they can smell the difference between fresh and dead flesh.) Seeing her survival instincts and her sword skills one would believe she was a bad ass before the apocalypse, but apparently she was merely a lawyer with a husband and kids. Michonne seems distant from  the group but has a deep respect for Rick, opening up to him and acting as a protector for the survivors as well as a surrogate mother for Carl. But one should never cross her: after her, Rick and Glenn are captured by another group of survivors she ends up being raped and savagely beaten by their malicious leader, the Governor. When Rick and Glenn free her from imprisonment, she leaves temporarily to get her revenge on the Governor... have I made the comparison to THE GIRL WITH THE DRAGON TATTOO yet? Cause her revenge rings true to that!


*HONORABLE MENTION*

Hershel (Television Version)
Hershel from the book was self-righteous, a bit of a bigot, and so blind to faith that he believed that he believes the end of days is here and keeps a barn full of "Walkers" as he awaits the Rapture. He didn't become likable until the end of his run in the comics. Television Hershel seems more humane. A hard man thanks to his father, Hershel informs Rick that, once Carl is healed and Sophia is found, Rick and his group must leave. It has nothing to do with Rick: he thinks Rick is a good man. But he has taken the responsibility of protecting the group of survivors that reside on his farm. Rick may promise to abide by Hershel's rules but he knows that Rick can't keep guys like Shane and Daryl in check. Even keeping the barn full of walkers seems to make sense. While Rick and his group of survivors have seen the horrors these "Walkers" present, Hershel and his group live out in the middle of no where. They don't see some monster; they see family, loved ones, friends, next door neighbors, etc. They see these people they know as being very sick and very carefully store them in a safe location that way, whether an act of god or mistake of science, they can heal them once a cure is found. The television version of Hershel might have made the list, but after what Shane and the others did during the midseason finale who knows where Hershel's head is at right now. Guess we'll find out in the rest of season 2.   

Speaking of:


THE WALKING DEAD RETURNS FEBRUARY 12 ON AMC!

1. Dork Trek

On a recent episode of the Dork Trek podcast Lt. Cmdr Bob Fresh said they just reached their 20,000th download, this actually made me extremely happy to hear, because for a long while I was convinced this podcast was made just for me, as if someone reached in my head and came up with my perfect idea of entertainment, that some of the guys behind the Bob's Boneyard Podcast and Mike and Bob Show would do an entire podcast just talking about Star Trek: The Next Generation, it was reassuring to hear that they had more than just myself as a listener. However, when I say this show was made for me I'm not exaggerating, in the episode "Secret Gay" the guys spend 5 minutes doing Juvenile-voice, somebody maybe only 7 people still remember, and most of those people also don't like TNG, they constantly bring up many of my other favorite shows, like The Simpsons, Seinfeld (seemingly every episode) Futurama, etc. The basic idea of the show is simple, they watch and review each episode of TNG, talking about the story of the episode while adding commentary as they do, and at the end rating each episode on a scale from 1 to 10. While its fun listening to them talk about the high ranked episodes like "Q Who?" or "Measure of a Man", its every bit of fun listening to them talk about episodes they either didn't like or were indifferent towards, their review of "Skin of Evil" entitled "Dead Dead Dead" featured the dudes doing 15 minutes of batman-voice and talking about what a horrible doctor Dr. Crusher is. Even though I consider myself a fan of TNG, they point out things that I never noticed like The Real Picard Maneuver, Step  1 Turn Around, Step 2 Surrender, Step 3 Blow Up The Ship!! They also pointed out what a terrible doctor Crusher was, and an even worse mother, and how much better Dr. Pulaski was, all things before this Podcast I never noticed.

The crew is made up of Lt. Cmdr Bob Fresh, Lt. Cmdr Dennis Black and Asian, Lt. Cmdr Tug Johnson, Lt Cmdr Zell, and Lt. Cmdr Ben McCormick, with the occasional guest, each member adds there own spin on things, Dennis basically serves as moderator, while Ben, seemingly an expert in all things Trek, serves as the Trek expert, leaving Zell, Bob, and Tug to add commentary, everyone on the show has their own tastes, and opinions about what makes a good episode, and they are all hilarious when it comes to poking fun at TNG and the entire Star Trek Universe. This Podcast is for everyone from the casual Star Trek fan to the diehard, and is literally unlike anything else out there, Star Trek podcasts take themselves way to seriously, and the motto of the crew of Dork Trek is "Actually, We Do Have Lives". For me this is really the best, greatest, and funniest thing to come out this year, someone recently said to me when I was quoting an episode of Dork Trek (again) "I think you're starting to like Dork Trek more than you like Star Trek" and I think they are right!!

2. The Game "Purp & Patron"

Click Here to Download "Purp & Patron"

Listening to The Game's mixtape "Purp & Patron" for the first time was like gaining your vision back after years of not being able to see. That may sound like a bit of an overstatement but considering my fondness for Hip-Hop, and the lack of Real Hip-Hop in recent years I would say its very accurate. Hip-Hop is at a weird place currently, a lot of rappers have become jacks of all trades, master of none, Lil Wayne for example is doing love song ballads, rock tracks, and Hip-Hop songs, and he's not the only one. Then "Purp & Patron" came out in January, it sounded like the Hip-Hop I grew up loving, while at the same time having a very modern sound to it as well. It was Hip-Hop at its purest and best, and far and away the best Hip-Hop album or mixtape I've heard in many years. Lyrically Game is unmatched on this mixtape, funny, clever, honest and finds Game telling stories versus just rhyming clever things, the production is ridiculous, featuring production from Phraell, Dre, T-Pain, Cool & Dre, 1500 or Nothin' to name a few. The 2 disc mixtape is loaded with nothing but great songs, ranging from fun tracks like "Soo Woo", or inspirational like "I'm The King", to Lakers themed tracks like the Wiz Khalifa inspired, rock infused "Purp & Yellow" to an Inspirational track like "The Kill". Game is channelling 2Pac, Dre, and Snoop at their very best on this mixtape, and I would dare say this mixtape is every bit as good as 2Pac's masterpiece "All Eyez on Me" and on the same level as Dre's "The Chronic" something before this year I never thought I would say.

A week later Game would come out with "Purp & Patron: The Hangover" which was every bit as good as the mixtape that came out the week before, it featured the songs and I quote "Not good enough for the Purp & Patron mixtape" one song off of the Hangover is the  Requiem For a Dream of music called "Lost" really good, but really sad, and as great as it may be I never want to hear it again. In early August Game came out with "HoodMorning" which was just as good as his two previous mixtapes, and just 3 weeks later he release his much talked about, much hyped "R.E.D. Album" which more than lived up to the expectations set for it. There is no question to me that Game is far and away THE RAPPER OF THE YEAR, his 4 mixtapes/albums are better than anything else anyone else came out with all year, I actually considered separating all four, but that would make this list slightly redundant. "Purp & Patron" reopened my eyes to just how great Hip-Hop could be, and set the bar high for the rest of the year in January, a bar no other rapper was able to get over. Game is not only the best rapper of the year, but "Purp & Patron" is the best mixtape or album released all year.

3. Episode 62 of Bob's Boneyard

Click Here to Listen to Episode 62 of Bob's Boneyard

The guys at Bob's Boneyard produce one of the best podcast out there, twice a week since April each episode has been hilarious pretty much from start to finish, and not to take anything away from the other episodes, but episode 62 may go down as the greatest single episode of any podcast EVER!! In April The Mike and Bob Show, a show that ran for almost 10 years in Hampton Roads, Virginia was canceled without warning, pretty much everyone woke up one day and it was gone. The Mike and Bob Show was unlike anything else that came before it (or since on traditional radio) it wasn't a drive-time zoo, it wasn't four idiots talking about Top 40 hits, playing the big songs of the day, it was personality driven radio at its very best. When the show was canceled it had a lot of its fans puzzled, the reason it was canceled as it turns out was due to a new ratings system combined with another format change on their home station 96x, once the home for alternative rock, now a station that plays Top 40 Pop. The cancelation led however to the Bob's Boneyard Podcast, which is only a more evolved, funnier, more profane version of the show that came before it. The Mike and Bob Show ran for almost 10 years and received no formal farewell, the show getting canceled sucked, no farewell was an injustice. On Episode 62 fans finally got their wish as Bob's Boneyard celebrated the 10 year anniversary of the Mike and Bob Show, while also having a reunion featuring members of The Mike and Bob Show from years past, and a few famous callers. The show felt like The Mike and Bob Show never left, it was a look back at 10 years that changed the way people thought about talk radio, giving each member of the show their moment, telling funny stories about the people that couldn't be there, and sharing personal favorite and least favorite moments of the run of the show, it was a perfect recap of a show that was so important to so many people, closing an important chapter while leaving the door open for more stuff to come in the future. There was a moment at the end were Bob Fresh and Mike Powers signed off using their trademark "Goodnight and Rock n' Roll" that chocked many people up and brought a tear to many an eye, for 10 years the Dudes left us with that same exit, and it was great they got to say at least one more time.

4. "Goodbye, Michael"

When the 7th Season of The Office started everyone knew Steve Carell was leaving the series to pursue other opportunities, so it was coming as no real surprise when an arc started towards the end of the season that would leave to Carell's character Michael Scott having to leave the office he loved so much. What was a surprise however was the final episode that featured Michael Scott, it was funny there was no doubt about it, but it was also surprisingly very touching, and not in the usual everyone cries sort of way, in fact the most touching moment for me and several people was when Michael Scott said his trademark phrase for the last time "That's what she said" only this time it was off mic and almost inaudible. It was great to see him tie up the relationships with everyone in the office, and the moment with him and Jim in his office and Pam at the airport where full of emotion, but emotion done right, not overly-sappy.